Facing Capital Campaign Fears: The Role of Dignity
I was recently with a group of friends when one of the couples told a story about their daughter’s boyfriend. He had come to their home to ask for their daughter’s hand in marriage, and they said no.
“Wow!” I said. “That must have been uncomfortable. Why’d you do it?”
Their reason for saying no was that the young man was pursuing his third college degree and had no career plans other than another degree. Okay, he needed to get his act together, but still, their answer seemed very harsh.
That conversation parallels my recent thoughts on dignity. In the instance of my friends, did they treat that young man with dignity? Should they have set aside their principles for his feelings? On a broader scale, are we humans treating one another with dignity?
These thoughts led me to The Golden Rule, the one we learn as children that goes something like this: Treat others as you would like to be treated. I was curious about the rule’s universality. How ancient and broadly accepted is it? Turns out, The Golden Rule is a center point throughout Eastern and Western religions and philosophies for as far back as written history exists.
Think on that for a moment. The Golden Rule is central to every structured society’s moral code. It is the basis for decent behavior in humans. It is the daily choice we make to honor the dignity due to every person.
Two of the most dignified people I’ve known were my father’s parents. They owned and operated New Camp Store in Eleven Mile Corner, Ariz., from the 1950s through the 1970s. Eleven Mile Corner is aptly named because it is 11 dusty, two-lane-road miles from three other towns: Eloy, Coolidge and Casa Grande. If you’re not familiar with south-central Arizona, picture flat, barren land checkered with cotton fields.
During my grandparents’ ownership, New Camp Store included a grocery, laundry mat, post office and gas station. My grandmother usually ran the cash register while my grandfather did all the ancillary jobs. He stocked the shelves, changed old tires on old cars, worked the butcher counter, helped people mail packages… they were busy people. And they worked as thoughtful professionals. Not with big smiles or idle small talk, but always helpful and always with a “Yes, ma’am” or “No, sir.” They chose, every day, six days a week, 10 hours a day a day, to treat people with dignity.
To be sure, my grandparents were not always nice to their clientele, who were the men, women and children working in the cotton fields. These people had hard lives and sometimes came into the store angry, drunk or both. In those instances, my grandfather would politely, or forcefully, help them leave.
Was my grandfather practicing The Golden Rule when he kicked someone out of his store? Were my friends practicing The Golden Rule when they said no to their daughter’s boyfriend?
Before I answer that, let me explain an important function of CampaignCounsel.org. When our team is helping lead a nonprofit’s capital campaign, we are often challenged by fear. The fear begins with the nonprofit; the individuals on the campaign committee are fearful of asking their family, friends and peers for big gifts. The risk becomes that the fear extends to our consultants, who then don’t want to push the campaign committee too hard to make big asks for fear of upsetting its members. When both sides are too fearful to act, both sides lose faith in the campaign. It’s our job to make sure that doesn’t happen.
This challenge we face in fundraising – fear – precisely aligns with The Golden Rule. You see, this rule can’t be simplified into “be nice to other people.” It’s much deeper. It’s about dignity. It is about being brave enough to expect the same level of accountability, maturity or civility from others as we do from ourselves. My grandparents expected civility from their customers, and they got it… usually. My friends expected maturity from their daughter’s boyfriend, and they got it. He has career plans and they will marry in the spring. Our clients expect us to take them to new fundraising heights and to hold them accountable to their vision. That’s exactly what we do.
Your capital campaign consultant should be there to educate you about the process, train you to do things you’ve never done, help you when the road gets rough and hold you accountable to your vision, even when fear steps in. When we work together with dignity and expect the best of each other, success follows.
Are you considering a capital campaign? Visit our free resources page to learn about the process. Or contact us to learn more.
Kevin Wallace is president of CampaignCounsel.org.
